I’d heartily recommend Sarah Kendzior’s writing to anyone wanting to understand the politics of race and class underlying what’s going on in Gaza — or Detroit, for that matter. It was via this piece on gender, power, and rape threats, however, that I first became aware of her — and was reminded of just how badly patriarchy, misogyny, and male entitlement can fuck things up.
Ah, friendzoning. The idea that if a man puts enough kindness coins into a lady a la vending machine, she is eventually obliged to push out sex.
Also, from the same piece: Is there anything more indicative of a fedora-clad b******t bro than a guy who says he’s been “friendzoned?”
Thanks, MRAs. Not only are you whiny, entitled little piece of shit losers — you’ve also ruined a perfectly good hat forever.
The choice for angry white men is not whether or not they can stem the tide of history: they cannot. Their choice is whether or not they will be dragged kicking and screaming into that inevitable future, or whether they will walk openly and honorably – far happier and healthier incidentally – alongside those they’ve spent so long trying to exclude.
Trigger Warning: violence
Yesterday night 17 people became the victims of a violent and deranged individual, a madman, who was unbalanced and ill. And yet another
white manpoor soul has committed an act of terrorismbeen a victim of inadequate mental health care. Or so the story goes.
Holy fucking shit. Of all the wrongheaded, misguided, head-up-the-ass bullshit I’ve read in reaction to that little misogynist piece of shite, this has to be one of the worst.
And what the fuck IS this “Good Men Project,” anyway?
Although the contract may have been shredded by greedy companies driven by greedier financiers, the sense of entitlement on the part of white men remains intact. Many white men feel they have played by the rules and expected to reap the rewards of that obedient responsibility. It’s pretty infuriating not to get what you feel you deserve. That’s the aggrieved entitlement that lies underneath the anger of American white men.
Michael Kimmel starts pulling at the threads making up the skein of white male entitlement.
#YesAllWomen because when I was sexually assaulted in the Navy, my commanding officer suggested it must have been a miscommunication between myself and that sailor since he was such a nice guy.
#YesAllWomen because when a man threatened to use me for target practice four years ago, the Laramie…
She may be a siren of demagoguery and treachery, but it doesn’t mean she’s wrong or you shouldn’t read her.
… men go on dates thinking they won’t get laid, and women go on dates thinking they might get raped, punched, maybe killed. Remember that as a man you can say all kinds of shit and add “lol” at the end of it and nobody gives a shit, but as a woman anything you say might be interpreted as antagonistic and end up with rape threats or death threats.
Anyone offended by this (and it’s gonna be a theme in my posts for a while, so strap in) is cordially invited to go fuck himself.
This kind of hateful rhetoric is exactly what MRA and PUA (Pick Up Artist) groups believe, and Rodgers was a known member. He was active on their forums, subscribed to their videos, and lifted their language in several disturbing videos published before the tragedy. He, like many MRA and PUA supporters, maintain a sense of entitlement towards women and their bodies, and consider men being dominant to women the natural order of things.
Men who subscribe to this kind of thinking are not necessarily so extreme as Rodgers, but that doesn’t make it any less troubling. You may have seen them hanging out at the mall, or on online dating sites (often referred to as “Nice Guys of Ok Cupid”). These are men who perpetuate a culture of misogyny and blame feminism for what they perceive as a reduction in men’s rights. They believe women owe them sex, should be submissive to their needs, and need to be put in their place. To restore the balance, these men are violent, sexually aggressive and disdainful towards women.
Posting this excerpt from another must-read. Because I can’t actually go looking for MRAs and PUAs - rape apologists, in plain English - to pound.