If policemen and doctors would just do their jobs, we wouldn’t have any crime or any death.
Look, I know you cops like hanging out at Dunkin Donuts most of the day. I know you doctors like playing golf every afternoon. But if you want to keep your cushy jobs, you’re going to have to step up and show us some RESULTS to justify your pay.
If a police department has more than three crimes per month committed in its jurisdiction, funding for the department will be cut, and some police officers will have to be fired until the crime rate goes down. If a two or more patients under a doctor’s care die (for any reason) in a single year, fifty-percent of that doctor’s salary will be garnished by the government, and he will risk losing his medical license if the survival rates do not improve.
Now, I already hear you complaining. “I’m a police officer in a dangerous area. We risk our lives each day, and we can’t afford to lose funding or manpower.” Or, “I’m a doctor who specializes in treating cancer patients and the elderly. I work as hard as I can to keep them alive against incredible odds.”
Well, guess what? Nobody forced you to become a police officer or a doctor. Get with the program, or get out of the field.
You see now, I hope, why I’m so focused on the meanings of words. George Orwell had a point.
Lincoln on labour and capital.
(h/t Mike Belmore)