I’d heartily recommend Sarah Kendzior’s writing to anyone wanting to understand the politics of race and class underlying what’s going on in Gaza — or Detroit, for that matter. It was via this piece on gender, power, and rape threats, however, that I first became aware of her — and was reminded of just how badly patriarchy, misogyny, and male entitlement can fuck things up.
Trigger Warning: violence
Yesterday night 17 people became the victims of a violent and deranged individual, a madman, who was unbalanced and ill. And yet another
white manpoor soul has committed an act of terrorismbeen a victim of inadequate mental health care. Or so the story goes.
Holy fucking shit. Of all the wrongheaded, misguided, head-up-the-ass bullshit I’ve read in reaction to that little misogynist piece of shite, this has to be one of the worst.
And what the fuck IS this “Good Men Project,” anyway?
#YesAllWomen because this is just a small sample of what I get to my PROFESSIONAL email and Facebook accounts.
Via @MorganBaskinTO. And I was just thinking, we don’t have enough worthless little assholes spouting off …
#YesAllWomen because when I was sexually assaulted in the Navy, my commanding officer suggested it must have been a miscommunication between myself and that sailor since he was such a nice guy.
#YesAllWomen because when a man threatened to use me for target practice four years ago, the Laramie…
She may be a siren of demagoguery and treachery, but it doesn’t mean she’s wrong or you shouldn’t read her.
… men go on dates thinking they won’t get laid, and women go on dates thinking they might get raped, punched, maybe killed. Remember that as a man you can say all kinds of shit and add “lol” at the end of it and nobody gives a shit, but as a woman anything you say might be interpreted as antagonistic and end up with rape threats or death threats.
Anyone offended by this (and it’s gonna be a theme in my posts for a while, so strap in) is cordially invited to go fuck himself.
This kind of hateful rhetoric is exactly what MRA and PUA (Pick Up Artist) groups believe, and Rodgers was a known member. He was active on their forums, subscribed to their videos, and lifted their language in several disturbing videos published before the tragedy. He, like many MRA and PUA supporters, maintain a sense of entitlement towards women and their bodies, and consider men being dominant to women the natural order of things.
Men who subscribe to this kind of thinking are not necessarily so extreme as Rodgers, but that doesn’t make it any less troubling. You may have seen them hanging out at the mall, or on online dating sites (often referred to as “Nice Guys of Ok Cupid”). These are men who perpetuate a culture of misogyny and blame feminism for what they perceive as a reduction in men’s rights. They believe women owe them sex, should be submissive to their needs, and need to be put in their place. To restore the balance, these men are violent, sexually aggressive and disdainful towards women.
Posting this excerpt from another must-read. Because I can’t actually go looking for MRAs and PUAs - rape apologists, in plain English - to pound.
So no, it’s not all men. But then it never was.
But if you think for one second, for one solitary second, that demanding tolerance for men as a group, that dismissing the reality of violence against women because not all men kill, not all men rape, if you think that’s more important than demanding justice for those who have been brutalised and murdered by those not all men, then you are part of the problem. You may not have pulled the trigger. You may not have raised your hand to a woman in your life. But you are part of the problem.
This is not the time, to use the refrain of apologists for bigotry, to play devil’s advocate. The devil has more than enough advocates today. On most days, I can put up with aggressive faux-objectivity being used to shout down women’s experiences and silence gendered trauma, but not today.
No more NotAllMen. Not ever.